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| PC: Myself |
I remember talking to her three years ago. She had just finished her graduation in Engineering. She was my junior by a year at the college. She spoke of her plans for the future, her dreams, her ambitions. An engineer who wished to design a sustainable world, an artist who aspired to voice the voiceless through the medium of her art.
Now when this lady claims she is the same girl, I am actually perplexed. That girl who debated with such fervor and passion for simple and frugal lifestyle is this lady who on a casual evening outing is dressed up like a burdened Indian bride on procession!? While she speaks with animated excitement of her husband's car, care and concern, I wonder where the girl, who aspired for an identity of her own, is lost. During the college days, I remember how enthusiastic and assertive she was. Eager to know, eager to understand. Has the genesis of the lady in her, killed that girl who she once was? The girl who dared to dream, who dared to question, who dared to experiment, who dared to explore avenues and opportunities.
I have no complaints about the lady she is. It is her life, her tastes, her choices. I respect all of that. My only worry is the girl she once was. Where did that girl vanish? In which dark corner of her psyche did she bury her, if she did so? And every time she talks about her present life, why is she displaying a sense of abundance? Is she unconsciously trying to convey that the loss of her dreams is compensated by the gain of material abundance? She was an engineer, bright enough to know that the increase in y doesn't necessarily balance out the decrease in x, because they are not always part of the same equation!
Maybe I am reading too much into the situation. Maybe it is all the pessimism within me; problem with my own preoccupied world view. I don't know the complete picture. I am probably jumping to conclusions despite lack of awareness. It is perfectly possible that her new found marital bliss and prosperity will eventually aid her dreams. Or better, maybe she can redesign her dreams. Who knows? What doesn't evolve, gets eliminated.
But still, she was probably 23 last year, when she got married. 24 this year, about to be a mother. With due respects to the institution of marriage and the sanctity of motherhood, I can't stop wondering what would she answer herself if next year she happens to introspect - "25. Who am I?" I pray the answer this lady finds will not disappoint the girl she once was.
Now when this lady claims she is the same girl, I am actually perplexed. That girl who debated with such fervor and passion for simple and frugal lifestyle is this lady who on a casual evening outing is dressed up like a burdened Indian bride on procession!? While she speaks with animated excitement of her husband's car, care and concern, I wonder where the girl, who aspired for an identity of her own, is lost. During the college days, I remember how enthusiastic and assertive she was. Eager to know, eager to understand. Has the genesis of the lady in her, killed that girl who she once was? The girl who dared to dream, who dared to question, who dared to experiment, who dared to explore avenues and opportunities.
I have no complaints about the lady she is. It is her life, her tastes, her choices. I respect all of that. My only worry is the girl she once was. Where did that girl vanish? In which dark corner of her psyche did she bury her, if she did so? And every time she talks about her present life, why is she displaying a sense of abundance? Is she unconsciously trying to convey that the loss of her dreams is compensated by the gain of material abundance? She was an engineer, bright enough to know that the increase in y doesn't necessarily balance out the decrease in x, because they are not always part of the same equation!
Maybe I am reading too much into the situation. Maybe it is all the pessimism within me; problem with my own preoccupied world view. I don't know the complete picture. I am probably jumping to conclusions despite lack of awareness. It is perfectly possible that her new found marital bliss and prosperity will eventually aid her dreams. Or better, maybe she can redesign her dreams. Who knows? What doesn't evolve, gets eliminated.
But still, she was probably 23 last year, when she got married. 24 this year, about to be a mother. With due respects to the institution of marriage and the sanctity of motherhood, I can't stop wondering what would she answer herself if next year she happens to introspect - "25. Who am I?" I pray the answer this lady finds will not disappoint the girl she once was.
it is extraordinarly good. i think most of our girls are in same position. I feel all girls should read this and introspect
ReplyDeleteThank you:)
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